Y despues de la cima...que?/ and after the top...what?

y despues de la cima que? es una pregunta que recientemente me pregunto a menudo. Aveces pienso que pasaria si algun dia logro la meta, que a la vez es mi motivacion. que me motivara despues. Si alcanzo lo sonado, que sonare despues. Es ironico... es como un muchachito que vendia chicles en la linea de regreso a Douglas, AZ. Le dijeron... "te compro todos los chicles" y el dijo "aaahh no, luego que vendo"....jajajja es dificil poder ver la siguiente montana cuando por tanto tiempo as escalado una y por fin llegas...te preguntas y despues de esta cima que? a donde miro? que tal is llegar a la cima no es tan emocionante como yo pensaba? que tal si me desiluciono? que tal si la vista no es tan espectacular como esperaba?
Tendre que ir mejor lento para en realidad evitar/retrasar mi llegada a la cima por miedo a la meta? o simplemente ya que estoy cerca tendre que apurarme y (con todo y mis miedos) hacer lo que haya que hacer y aceptar el exito o la derrota que me espera.. Es el sabotaje a uno mismo como dice una amiga....no lo se.

After the top...what? thats the question I've been asking my self lately. Sometimes I think what would happen if I reach the top, which at the same time is my motivation. what's gonna be my motivation afterwards? If I make my dream come true, what am I gonna dream later? It's ironic. This is like that time when I met this boy who was seling gum pieces in the street in the waiting line coming back to Douglas, AZ, he was asked "What if I buy all gum pieces from you? he responded " ooohh no! what am I gonna sell later?" jajaja It's hard to see the next mountain, when for so long you have been hiking this one and when you are finally there you ask yourself... what after the top? where do I look next? what if getting to the top is not as exciting/amazing I thought it was gonna be? what if I get dissapointed? what if the view is not as spectacular as I though it was going to be?
should I go slow to delay my getting to the top because of my fears? or since I am already so closse, should I hurry and find out (regardless of my fears and everything) to find out the sucess or the oposite...Self-sabotagge as a good friend of mine says.... I don't know.